Closing the chapter ... 2025: Rollercoaster of Reconstruction

Another year passes and the moment of being an “accountant of time” is nigh. What can I say; this year has been pretty much what it says in the title: A rollercoaster of reconstruction. Because this year was one hell of an up-and-down ride. On the lower end, some things in the life in general got me to points where shutting up wasn’t an option. The problem is when this side took full control of my actions which then resulted in being more hurtful than resourceful. On the high end, the good moments of the year were amazing and there are more to come. But first, let’s do the accounting :3

I can’t start with anything other than the visit to the Gardens of Zen; my first ever furcon. And while the immediate magic has waned already, the experience was eye- and mind-opening. What I didn’t anticipate back then however was the long-term impact. That trip has sown seeds of something I was to figure out months later. Either way, being around my fluffy kin was a breath of life I desperately needed. And it fueled my drawing skills too since not only I got some inspiration and audience (and “victims” of my ideas :P) but also a mentor and motivator (Kanjon just knows how to do this job ;3).

Speaking of fluffy adventures, Eurofurence happened later in September and it only built up on that which I unknowingly started in February; restoring and rebuilding my connection with people around me. Yes, that one thing I didn’t know I lacked for I always stayed “on the side”. Turns out I wasn’t looking in the right places and when there was a chance I didn’t take it. But that changed this year and I’ve got folks to look forward to. Even better, it made the online experiences way more “alive”. Thank you Kianga and co. for making the FediFloofs meet-up :3

But what about my crafty endeavours? Well, you’ve seen the results towards the end of the year. I dropped the hint last year that my future is orange. And this year I took that to my heart and “gave life” to Roky, my foxy self. And just as he makes me smile in his arts, he does the same when I “don” him. There’s no way I can stay steady being him. I made him to be the “opposite” of my old self. Turns out he’s me. Specifically the happiest side of me. Now each time I look at my “workbench”, two faces stare at me. One being my woof with his subtle smile, fangs peeking out and the other being my bright foxy with his open smile and cosy eyes. Bringing my floofs to life really brings me joy and there’s still more to do. Body suits for both, the outfit for Roky; hell, who says I need to just stop there? I’ve got quite a few pieces of art of my floofs in various costumes. And I got the tools to make them! Looks like there’s a bit of “playing dress up” for this woof in the future.

But the year of course wasn’t all sunshine and rainbows. Sometimes being the one person folks lean on for help can be tough to handle. And with my ways to recover being limited, this can wear me down quite quickly. I really need to learn my limits. Further more, my place of living threw away any remaining ounce of respect it ever had, neglecting its own history. For me, who’s aware of this and isn’t willing to just “bend down and shut up”, it makes my blood boil, pushing me towards the kind of anger which does nothing but hurt my already fragile soul. Combine this with choices of some that will slowly make me an “undesirable” while claiming to protect me and one can’t help but let the rage out. But again, how does that help me? It doesn’t. And it hurts those around me

What lies ahead?

Ok, so what’s coming for me? Well, first things first, more furcons. Revisiting the NFC in February, this time around as Roky and very much in the theme. After all, every circus needs a ringleader :3 Next will be Awoostria. I want to give a bit more space to smaller cons and NFC is already massive. Not to mention EF is an expensive venture and while I’d love to meet up with folks there, I don’t think I’ll be able to cover to handle the costs. But who knows, an opportunity might present itself and I’ll be able to get there. Also, Awoostria is really close by so visiting the place is easy. There’s also another neat bonus; I’ll be a “guide” for a friend at the con so that will be an interesting experience.

How about creative ventures? Well, I’m not giving up drawing, that’s for sure. Writing … Of course I’ll continue but I have to make sure my thoughts are collected and I’m not just ranty. Because I’ll have tons of things to rant about and doing just that will wear me down. Suit-making? Hmmm, third time’s a charm? My inner doggo would like some “walkies” and I want to try some new ways for some of the parts and Archie will be a nice “test subject”. I might even make second version of my woof with the alternative bright colours. And he might occasionally grow a pair of wings :3

But what about my personal, inter-personal and fluffy sides? Let’s make a list, shall we?

Alright, that’s probably all I can say. So … some closing thought? Last year I went with “Rebel away!” This time around, in the spirit of the previous points, I’m going to borrow a quote from an actress from my country. The actress has passed away years ago but the quote has been used as an epitaph. If I were to translate it, it’d go something like this:

Remember to smile. It is a light that tells everyone around that your heart is at home.

So, my dear readers, fellow fluffy, scaly, meaty folks … Remember to smile :3

R.R.A.