Rawen's Musings

So, you’ve probably noticed I use a lot of furry-related material and from my presentation you could say I indeed am one. You know, the usual “walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, it’s a duck” approach. So why do I answer “Yes and No” to that question? Or why do I refuse to use the “furry” label with me? Well, strap in for the ride because it may be a little wild.

Yes, I like the main idea

One reason I answer yes is that I like the main idea of the fandom. The creation of an animal character that represents you in some form is a neat idea, similar to creating a character in a video game or a table-top RPG. And let’s be honest, the real life is a form of RPG except you have no special abilities and you’re not exactly a hero or THE main character. You’re A main character of YOUR story but that’s a possible talk for another time.

So yes, I like the character-building part of the fandom as it allows me to not only create a wholesome image of myself but also through giving parts of my personality an easier form to grasp it also allows me to better explore, understand and possibly incorporate the traits into my actual self.

Yes, the fandom in general is wholesome

Mildly controversial and I’ll get there later but overall my experience with the fandom is more positive than negative. The folks I’ve managed to stumble upon are quite neat and usually very ordinary. So much so that they’d blend into the crowd unless they’d want to show off on purpose. The people are often quite positively minded or neutral and in rare cases absolutely amazing friends and more.

Yes, the fandom is super open-minded

Relative to many other communities, furs are really open-minded when it comes to being “non-typical” (LGBTQ+, neurodivergent etc.). Big part of it stems from the fact that the fandom was usually a refuge for generally rejected (often for silly or downright idiotic reasons) people so they gathered up and created a space where folks like this can feel much safer being themselves.

Wait, I’m listing positives but there’s negative tone in my heading? Where’s the juice? Where’s the drama? First, no drama is intended. Second, I’ll get right into it.

No, the fandom doesn’t present itself well

One big reason I personally refuse to use the label is fandom’s presentation. Like, I understand that it’s about being open but there are still things that are supposed to stay “behind close doors” and not to be taken into public. This would be much less of an issue if the fandom was a niche but it isn’t anymore and that carries a certain level of responsibility (I’ll get into that shortly) when presenting yourself. And sadly, fandom has large problems with that.

No, the fandom is not a safe space

Whoo boy, this one’s going to hurt but I learnt this lesson the hard way. Despite me saying that the fandom is open-minded and wholesome in general, its openness is also one of its greatest weaknesses. The fandom in its efforts of trying to include as many various people as possible has a tendency of falling into the trap of not holding proven bad actors accountable. Often this emerges in form of excusing said behaviour, ousting the victims or minimising the issues. “This person is acting so adorably. How can they be bad?!” Oh, you sweet summer child, you’d be horrified. And I don’t mention the low respect to personal boundaries. So while the fandom is SAFER, it isn’t 100% safe. Keep that in mind whenever interacting with furs because they’re still people in the end as we all are.

No, the fandom’s positive nature isn’t always honest

This one is linked to the safety part and the often apparent lack of accountability but one of the bad traits of the fandom is the obsession with positivity, often stepping into the toxic positivity area. Many spaces are laced with the “positive vibes only” or “no drama” labels etc. There’s however a massive issue with that because it can very much lead into the previously mentioned inability to hold bad actors accountable because if they act positively on the outside, it’ll be easy to brand you as the bad actor for calling out the actual “bad one” because “you bring negativity”. At that moment it’s literally better to step away and let the people learn the hard way how they were fooled.

So yeah, that’s why I refuse to call myself a “furry” and give a side-eye to everyone who calls me that. Because accepting this label means accepting the huge issues the fandom carries with it and has little will to change. And since I’m very much not ok with those, I’d rather keep my distance than letting the fandom into my personal space. With all that said, and to not end on the sour note, the general vibe of the fandom is in fact a net positive and if there’s an actual effort in making it act upon the good sides while “cleaning the room” from the bad things, I might be less hesitant to accept the “brand”.